have you ever noticed that when the winds blows by and tickles your neck, that it can actually
whispers secrets too?
secrets that open your eyes to the world.
not the people in the world, or the cars, or all those worldly things.
but the nature of the world.
its easy to live your life not noticeing
that the tree in your backyard is growing with you.
its easy to watch your best friend- partner in crime
dog to live its very first day and its last.
its easy to take the life of a fish to satisfy your life.
but whats hard is watching
your own life
as a person
live and die.
I never have thouhgt of it like that.....thanks for changing my perspective. Also your poem sucked:) good job!
ReplyDeleteMUCH BETTER. I thought your first one was really funny though.
ReplyDeleteAnyways, great insight. Maybe work on clarity and eloquence? I don't know, just a suggestion.
I think that this was a little bit hard to read smoothly, but i think it has some great potential definitely. The first poem was quite funny. I did enjoy it. I like that it shows different ways to look at life, and of every kind. Neato Gang!
ReplyDeleteRon.
I thought you did a good job! Like the perspective you had on it! I really liked the line "the tree in your backyard is growing with you" thought that was a clever connection.
ReplyDeleteyou did a wonderful job on this. I really liked when you said "but whats hard is watching your own life as a person live and die." I think that is a great ending to this poem! Great job!
ReplyDelete